Avengers Vs. X-Men Part 1: Captain Government-Stooge

        Okay. Comics time. HUGE SPOILER ALERTS!!! Here is an overview of Avengers Vs. X-Men (so far), the huge event going on in Marvel Comics right now. (I'll interject my thoughts here and there) Jean Grey took her own life some years back to rid the world of the intensely powerful and destructive Phoenix Force that chose Jean as a host body. Though Jean has (as of this post) remained dead, the Phoenix Force is on it's way back to earth. Most every superhuman believes the Phoenix is headed towards Hope, the first mutant born since the Decimation. (The Decimation was an event in which all but 198 of earth's mutants were depowered or killed.) While Cyclops and most of the X-Men see Hope as the mutant messiah that can be trained to handle the Phoenix, while Captain America and most of the Avengers see the Phoenix as a force meant only to destroy earth. So...Captain America decides it's a good idea to go Utopia (Island home of Cyclop's X-Men) and demand to take Hope into custody. Cyclops sees this as not only an infringement of Hope's rights, but as an attack on mutant rights as a whole.

    I don't think Captain saw this as an attack on mutant rights. But how can "Freedom's Sentry" think it's okay to show up to someones home and just take a child into custody? 

    So back to the story. Cyclops is not happy. So unhappy in fact, Cyclops blasts Captain with his optic blasts. Captain, apparently expecting things to go south in a hurry, commands a SHIELD Hellicarrier hiding in the clouds down carrying a dozen or so Avengers. (Luke Cage, Red Hulk, The Thing, Spider-Man, Spider-Woman, Giant Man, Black Widow, Iron Man, Doctor Strange, Black Panther, Iron Fist, Hawkeye, Mockingbird, and Daredevil to be exact.) All hell breaks loose (and in Magik and Doctor Strange's cases, literally). Magneto makes Colossus' metal body fly into the hellicarrier. Colossus starts tearing the ship to shreds. A voice comes from behind the Juggernaut powered Colossus asking, "So you're the strongest on this island?". Red Hulk throws a punch at Colossus which if I remember correctly sends then plunging into water along the Avengers thrown off by Colossus' rampage. Several fights break out under the waves: Juggernaut-Colossus vs. Red Hulk, and Namor vs. Luke Cage and the Thing. Colosuss starts wooping on Red Hulk. I mean REALLY wooping on him. Piotr loses control of the Juggernaut within him and starts giving Red Hulk the worst beating of his career. Red Hulk points to an underwater pillar holding up Utopia that Colossus has cracked. Unable to stop himself, Piotr demands Red Hulk beat him unconscious. Red Hulk proceeds to oblige. Luke Cage must swim to shore or something as he has left the fray between Thing and Namor. I'll get this one over quickly because it pissed me off. The Thing wins over Namor the Submariner...in water. Yep. Dumb.

    On the shores, battles break off everywhere. One of the most prominent being Magneto vs. Iron Man. Another match that made me sort of angry. Iron Man comes into battle wearing a non-metal suit made of nano-tubes. Okay, fine. Magneto fights people that don't have metal armor all the time. Magneto should have crushed Iron Man. Well, he did with a building, but Iron Man just sort of crawled out with a headache. Point is, Iron Man won.  Bringing the score Avengers: 3 to X-Men: 0. WEAKSAUCE.

          To skip ahead some, the X-Men surrender. It turns out to be a ruse, and they escape using Magik's teleportation and Emma Frost's mind clouding to stay hidden on their search for Hope. (Forgot to mention Hope ran off feeling like a pawn in all this.) Wolverine goes with Captains team of Avengers to search the Savage Land for Hope. Captain brings into question Wolverine's loyalty. Wolverine still seems content on killing her to once again rid the universe of the Phoenix. Instead of Captain just keeping an eye on Wolverine, Captain SUCKER PUNCHES HIM IN THE FUCKING FACE. A fight breaks out between them with Wolverine seemingly winning when Captain calls in a waiting Giant Man to ATTACK WOLVERINE FROM BEHIND. Still not down, Wolverine looks as if he's about to stand again to fight, CAPTAIN AMERICA ORDERS MOCKINGBIRD TO SUCK WOLVERINE OUT OF HE PLANE INTO A FREEFALL TO ANTARCTICA. The caps are to show my surprise that Captain America would stoop so low. Even knowing Wolverine is pretty much unkillable, that's messed up for Captain America. Check out my next post coming later today where I'll write about superhero brawls I want to see and who I think will win.